dear b-line train riders,
let me start this off by saying: Hygiene Is Important. seriously, it really is. but to take it a step further, Proper Hygiene Is Important.
for example:
- soap and water? they’re your friends, man. they keep you clean.
- same with shampoo & i dare say conditioner (it keeps the hair silky and smooth!) ps to all you filthy hipsters who spend $$$ on “products” to make it look like you sleep in garbage every night: YOU LOOK LIKE YOU SLEEP IN GARBAGE.EVERY.NIGHT.
- clean clothes? probably wouldn’t hurt.
which brings us to my next item: deodorizers.
deodorant is your friend, boys and girls. it really is. and to a degree perfume/eau de cologne/aftershave can be too. but here’s the point i need to be clear about:
NO ONE SHOULD BE ABLE TO SMELL YOUR SHITTY ASS “COLOGNE” EMANATING FROM WITHIN A PACKED SUBWAY CAR FROM OUTSIDE THE FUCKING TRAIN!!!
EVER.
just now? standing outside the harvard ave. stop, the doors open and out wafted the most putrid smell of shitty ass cologne (is there such a brand? Shitty Ass™?). all through the first car, the smell dominated. even in the back. even overtaking the general ‘wet-dog-hobo-urine-and/or-stale-vomit’ smell that public transportation seems to have. and that? that is just fucking wrong. wrong wrong wrong. because either the person/people in question did shower/bathe/whatever and felt the need to follow-up with a second step of lolling in a vat of ass; or, the ofalctory offenders decided “who needs soap? i can just cover it up with this nifty ass cologne and no one will ever be the wiser!”. FAIL.
i suppose i’m impressed? the plague that cut me down last week is still lingering in my sinuses and i haven’t been able to smell much of anything in the last 2 weeks, but tonight T-Stench cut through. congrats, b-line passengers, that took effort. (but also makes me think that if i was smelling only a “fraction” of the T-Stench, how bad was it, really?)
but i digress, and my first point stands: hygiene = important, but make sure it’s proper hygiene, man.
HYGIENE, UR DOIN’ IT WRONG B-LINERS!
as always, die in a fire!
sincerely,
deez nutz
mine :