you know that part in the movie “gremlins” where you’ve fed gizmo after midnight and gotten his bitch ass wet and exposed him to sunlight or whatever? and you know that’s a bad thing because that fuzzy motherfucker is so delicate that the slightest change or deviation from the ‘gremlin rules’ will just fuck his shit up…
and he turns into that little slimy pod thing that incubates the horrible, non-fuzzy gremlins and turns them into ridgy, cranky little bastards with scales and teeth? you know the part where the slime pods burst open and the bastard gremlins crawl out? right before they go buck wild and start fuckin’ shit up in earnest?
that’s what my insides feel like right now.
fuckin’ uterus, you’re a gremlin bastard!